First Tri “Signs”

It was tough being told I shouldn’t be ultra running, fighting anemia for months to work back up to close to where I was before I got sick last fall. It was harder still trying to ignore the voices in my head that kept telling me that maybe I’m just not athletic enough or maybe I just wasn’t meant to run. I can’t fight genetics and maybe running won’t work for my body. I might not be a fast runner, but I do love to run. I love to be out in the woods and I absolutely loved getting through my first 50K and still hope to do a 50 miler.  The doctor said to start biking and swimming instead of running as much; tenaciously I had to give triathlons a try.

The First Tri triathlon is a super sprint with a 400 meter swim, 9 mile bike, and 2 mile run. I was nervous more than excited; mostly afraid I would be miserable trying to finish the swim. The bike and run I knew I could do. The swim was likely to be my downfall. Training was rough and swimming wasn’t getting much easier. The final brick workout of swim 30 min/ bike 30 min/ run 30 min went horribly. I was recovering from a cold and kept coughing and choking as I tried to tread water and clear my lungs enough to keep going.  Then my legs where too tired with calves cramping during the run and I ended up walking most of it. I started to get depressed and think, “Well, crap, maybe I’m going to suck at this”.

The days leading up to the race weren’t very promising. Wednesday, the swim portion was cancelled. Thursday it was back on again. Weather was predicted to be fairly cold with temperatures in the upper 50s that morning and I hadn’t invested in a wet suit. But I had a co-worker encouraging me on and listening to her talk about her lack of training and her own disastrous swim gave me hope that I might not do too badly. Steve was there as support crew, happy for me, encouraging me. I was going to give this a Tri a try and I was going to put forth my best effort, still unsure if I would really enjoy it. It’s not like running; it’s not the get into a rhythm meditation that gets me through my long runs. This would take a different kind of mental toughness.

I was in one of the last waves standing on the beach, toes and fingers turning blue from the cold, shivering and again wondering if I could do this when I had an epiphany.  As the sun was gradually rising and warming up the sand and I watched the first few waves go out I remembered the time I lived on a lake. Those summers I lived in the water, pretending to be a dolphin or an otter. I spent most of every day swimming. I might not be able to do the freestyle correctly but I could still enjoy the water. I started noticing small things that seemed like positive signs. I was counted off as I entered the corral as #21, my family’s lucky number. My age, 42, was written on my leg. Not a bad thing to have the answer to life the universe and everything written on your calf for a race. Before I knew it I was in the water and it was reach, breath, reach, breath, not worrying about the bodies around me who might be slower or faster. I was simply enjoying the rhythm, enjoying the feel of the water and enjoying the jokes and comments of the other swimmers around me.  By the time I started to get tired I could see the finish line and I didn’t bother with the resting backstroke I had practiced; I pushed through until I could stand and wade out. With somewhat shaky legs but overall feeling good I was on to the transition and Steve’s smile and on the bike and I’m off again. The bike was fun! I was passing people, and only a few people were passing me. It felt good, I felt strong and before I knew it I was back in transition with really wobbly legs. I walked the bike in, grabbed my water bottle and headed back out but damn my calves went from burning to cramping and the only stride I could manage was a hopping stride that I knew was more a up and down dancing motion than the forward run that I needed, but it was that or walk so I just kept going and repeating over and over in my head “I will loosen up, it will get better, just keep going and it will get better.” I was passed by a woman with a pink Run 4 Wine shirt which was from the first year that I started running; I did that race with another friend who encouraged and coached me into better form. I pulled my trunk up and heard her voice in my head saying “C’mon girl get those Ta Tas up”.

I started to feel a little better and was getting to the first turn around at the half mile mark, finally able to get a better stride, when I was paced by a woman with a Trail Marathon shirt, my favorite spring race. We chatted for a few and she pulled ahead. I didn’t mind, I saw her age on the back of her calf was 34. It doesn’t feel as bad being passed by someone almost 10 years younger than me. The path changed from pavement to trail and suddenly I felt at home, with a little rush of feeling that this is where I belong. I didn’t let myself pick up pace yet. I wanted to save myself for a good push at the finish. I did start running the hills, and got a huge cheer from one of the race marshals at the top of the 1.5 mile mark hill. Half a mile left and I knew I could start pushing it. I focused on pushing from the glutes, kicking my feet back, then rounded the corner and saw the final hill leading up to the finish and knew I could still sprint in. I did it! A short triathlon, but still I did more than try a tri, I finished happy and strong. I felt great and did so much better than in any of my trainings. First Tri won’t be my last. I now have a whole new world of training that has opened up to me.